Sunday, January 2, 2011

Precious moments

Warning:  This post talks about the loss of a child and may be extremely emotional for people that have experienced their own loss.

I was extremely moved by something I recently read.  It was a comment from a mother that had lost her baby.  She shared her story about being busy and letting her husband care for their baby so she could finish her work, not knowing that the next morning he would be gone.  Then she said:
It's so easy to let what we think is important get in the way of what really is sometimes! It's so easy to get caught up...
If my story helps just one momma to remember "stop and smell the roses" then that makes me happy.
This story was so moving to me.  It's so easy to get bogged down with all the daily jobs and chores and important things to do that I know I forget to stop and smell the roses, or am just too tired to care to try.

I'm sure when you lose a child, there is not one moment spent doing something else that you don't regret.  I can not imagine that pain.  But even if you never have to experience that kind of loss, these precious moments you have now, with your ever changing child, are limited and will soon be gone forever.  They are growing and changing all the time, and someday, will no longer need you the way they do now.

Unfortunately it's just not practical to spend every second with our child or we would never get fed or cleaned.  But what we can do is cherish the moments we do spend with them.  Take 15 minutes to build that block building with them.  Color a picture.  Tell them a story.  And when you do, let everything else go and just enjoy that moment with them.  Don't try to read faster because you need to get dinner started.   Five years from now it won't matter if you all ate dinner 10 minutes late.  But what you gain from spending those 10 minutes with your child will last forever.

These fleeting precious moments are also the reason I enjoy co-sleeping and don't worry about weaning.  Sure I am tired and would get more sleep if my children slept in their own bed and my baby wasn't waking me up to nurse.  But I have the rest of my life to sleep.  Right now my baby needs me and my children feel loved and secure sleeping next to me.  I know some day my kids won't need me in that way anymore, and so while they still do, I want to fill that need and not force them to give it up before they are ready.

So the next time you are frustrated that your baby just wants to be held all day, or you toddler wants to nurse, again, forget about the dishes and just cherish these precious moments you have because before you know it, they will be gone.  This moment is just a sliver of time in our lives and we are living them now.

And with that I will leave you with this final thought.  I hope this post has inspired you to stop and smell the roses, if even for a moment!
"Yesterday's the past and tomorrow's the future. Today is a gift - which is why they call it the present."  -Bill Keane


  1. Thanks for the reminder! I've had a loss myself and haven't taken a single parenting moment for granted. I would *never* wish a loss on anyone but I do wish every parent would parent their child as if every moment counts, cherish them even at 4 in the morning when you've already woke up 3 times that night.

  2. How beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing that!